There was a governor named Spitzer
Who needed more fizz in his spritzer
Though his wife is quite comely
He was bored with so much money
So called a whore in order to blitz her

Who can blame this poor Spitzer
For desiring girls so dislike his sister
From Clinton to Foley to Craig
All have drunk deep of these dregs
And flushed their careers down the pisser

But lest we lose our sense of proportion
Leaven some sympathy in the equation
For though Spitzer’s career’s in the loo
We know he was only trying to do
To her what Bush’s done to the nation

Such deep morasses we have never seen
Besieged with scandal on scandal it seems
Immigration, torture and health care
War, taxes, corrupt corporate welfare
Eliot’s just dirty but these are obscene

You see, DC is quite the pretty bordello
Politics and prostitutes are natural bedfellows
Lobbyists’ bribe money is green
Blackmail works best when unseen
Morals are blue, hands red and ethicss are yellow

So here’s to poor little Eliot Spitzer
Who had to pimp a whore and then ditz her
For power has its own prerogatives
But you must avoid the interrogatives
Or wind up on CNN with Wolf Blitzer